President Trump Goes Vegan
Tl;dr: this article is a satire about Trump and veganism.
In what is probably one of the strangest electoral campaigns of modern civilization, Donald Trump, the president of the United States, has announced on Twitter earlier today that he had planned to go vegan. “After looking at scientific work from Dr. Michael Greger, Melania and I have decided to go vegan! Let’s make America great and vegan again!!”
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President Trump explained that as he was seeking a program speaking highly of him on TV last night, he stumbled across a vegan documentary.
“I was instantly convinced that meat was bad for the human body and that plant-based diets are really healthy”, Trump confirmed to a Fox News correspondent. “I think it would be very good for this country if everyone went vegans. We are going to study that very closely. Schools and companies that ban meat may benefit from federal funding to realize that. Veganism is now part of the Make America Great Again plan! Go vegan!”
Michael Greger was subsequently interviewed. “I have been working hard to prove how healthy meat-based diets are my entire life. To have the president going vegan is fantastic, we need to establish a vegan world as soon as possible if we wish to save our health, planet, and healthcare system!”
The move has surprised many professionals in the healthcare industry. While it is true that the recent decade has seen an explosion of YouTubers, athletes, pop stars, and other influencers going vegan, a wide majority of them quit their diets to reintroduce meat after a couple of years, citing health reasons.
“This actually might be good, said Dr. Shawn Baker, a former US Army surgeon, and advocate of the carnivore diet. The vegan diet is unhealthy and having a president going vegan will finally show the world how detrimental to health veganism is. It might take a couple of years, but we’ll make it”.
The president’s personal physician Dr. Bornstein declined to comment.